Growing up in a family with abusive narcissistic family members can be incredibly challenging. It can take a toll on your mental and emotional well-being, leaving you feeling drained, isolated, and powerless. However, it's essential to remember that you are not alone, and there are ways to handle these situations with compassion and self-love.
When I was growing up, my father was an abusive narcissist. He was controlling, and manipulative, and would often belittle and demean my grandmother, mother, and other sibling and me. It was challenging to navigate his unpredictable abusive behavior, and it often left us feeling powerless and trapped. However, as an adult, I learned how to handle his behavior and create boundaries to protect myself.
The first step in dealing with abusive narcissistic family members is to recognize their behavior. Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance and often lack empathy for others. They can be manipulative, controlling, and belittling, toward those around them. They take zero responsibility for the pain they inflict and manipulate the story to make you feel you do not remember things accurately. They will gaslight light you, making you feel like you are insane. It's important to understand that their behavior is not your fault and that you do not deserve to be treated poorly.
The second step is to practice acts of love towards yourself. This can include setting healthy boundaries, saying no to things that do not serve you, and prioritizing your own needs. It can be challenging to put yourself first, especially when dealing with abusive family members, but it's essential to remember that self-love is not selfish. By prioritizing your own well-being, you can create a more positive and healthy environment for yourself.
The third step is to have zero tolerance for abusive behavior. This means that you need to set clear boundaries with your family members and stick to them. This can include having zero contact with them. It can be tempting to try and placate a narcissistic family member, but this often leads to more abuse. By having zero tolerance for their behavior, you are sending a clear message that their actions are not acceptable, and they are no longer welcome to be part of your life.
One way to practice acts of love towards a narcissistic family member is to practice empathy towards them. While their behavior is not acceptable, it's important to remember that they are also dealing with their own struggles and insecurities. This does not excuse their behavior, but it can help you understand where they are coming from and how to approach them with compassion. You can accept calls from them, while keeping it clear you no longer wish to see them until they can be neutral or uplifting, leaving the past where it belongs. As you do not tolerate abuse or manipulation. If they can recognize the pain they have inflicted upon you and the family, and apologize with complete sincerity, you may give them the opportunity to see them again.
It's also important to seek support from others outside of your family. This can include friends, therapists, or support groups. It can be challenging to talk about your family's abusive behavior, but having a support system can provide you with the tools and resources you need to handle these situations.
In conclusion, dealing with abusive narcissistic family members can be incredibly difficult. However, by practicing acts of love towards yourself and having zero tolerance for their behavior, you can learn how to handle these situations with compassion and self-love. It's important to remember that you are not alone and that seeking support from others can provide you with the tools and resources you need to heal and thrive.
In Joy and Love,
Mr. Michael Adams
Director at Keep Inspiration Alive
Book recommendations (these are affiliate links and by purchasing I get a small amount of money. This helps support me in creating more content)
The Power of Unwavering Focus by Dandapani
Karma a Yogi's Guide to Crafting YourDestiny by Sadhguru